Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Dicovery


Hi all,

I know what you all are thinking about this new post, but let me clear your doubts if any. This post is not abt the 'Discovery' channel or the NASA spaceship....

Before starting, let me tell you what led me to write this post.

In my thesis for my PhD degree I was supposed to write about the animals found in the jungles of Amazon. For this I took advice from my Mentor, he instead guided me too my Department Head (The indefatigable ‘Mr. Snehal’). My Dept. Head, a real good man that he is, instantly agreed to help me by coming along with me on my voyage to the Amazon (not the Website OK). He also got his good friend (a noted Environmentalist 'Mr. Moiz') along. We all started out on our Great Journey.

We had a very tiring trip. By the time the trip came to an end I had enough material for my thesis. It was our last day of the trip. We were completely tired and wanted to wrap things up as quickly as possible and return back home from the interiors of the Amazon. On our way back Mr. Moiz (the Environmentalist) found something interesting. He called out to us (literally yelled) to have a look at the thing of his interest. After a while we all were looking at it with stunned expressions. We had never seen anything like it before. It was a beauty of Nature.

Sure this Discovery would have made Mr. Charles Darwin a proud man today.

So, Friends am glad to inform that there has been a new addition to the Kingdom Animalia.

About the Creature:-

The creature closely resembles a Caterpillar, but is much larger in size (maybe 10-12 feet in size). The main attraction of the creature is its Eyes. That's the reason why we were hooked onto it .We have named it Moi-Sne-Menor, a small tribute to us for such a great Discovery. We were lucky enough to find a baby Moi-Sne-Menor and even captured it on Camera(plz. find the attached the photo). Being green in color it was camouflaged with leaf so nicely that we didn't even notice it. It was feasting on the leaf as if it hadn't eaten since 10 yrs. We even made a video of it feasting on the leaves. Finally, when we had enough footage for our Discovery and the channel too (yes we will be airing the documentary if they agree to pay half of the ad money that they will earn when the premiere and reruns of the documentary will be aired ), we waved good-bye to our new found friend, who is still waiting to being recognized.

We need to check if we need to create a new Sub-Kingdom for Moi-Sne-Menor.

Will keep you updated if we happen to find any ‘New Mysteries of the World’.

Bye for now
Kurt,
Final Yr. PhD

34 comments:

HP said...

@CDEMenon,

Aah..Loved the post. Really the usage of language was good and the story was really well-played. You guys are quickly learning from me. :-)

Cheers,
HP

Anonymous said...

@Kurt,

How dare you name that creature without consulting the Society For Naming of New Species.

You have been condemned to 10 more 9:30-12:30 meetings.

Angry,
Maneka Gandhi

Ziom said...

New Mysteries of the World continued...

The three guys namely Kurt, Snehal SE (Super Environmentalist, he is soon going to become one) Jawkar, and The noted Environmentalist Moiz (Some how I love this word “Noted Environmentalist”) spent the rest of the day shooting and documenting the creature (Moi-Sne-Menor). Moiz wanted to touch the creature and conclude some physical aspects of the creature, so he gently stroked the creature (There was an X-rated comment by Mr. Snehal about him stroking the creature. They have to edit that part from the documentary to get a PG rating for it). As soon as they were about to wrap up, they found that someone was observing them very carefully from a distance. He was Elango the Tribal leader of the jungles of Amazon. He came closer to them and said in his own language “Agar ye katega to Aadmi baithega nahi” . For some time they were clueless but Kurt (calls these kind of people Maalik) who knew the language very well came to there rescue, he translated it for the rest of the two, he said, “If the creature bites a person he won’t be able to shit… sorry, sit”. They tried to ignore the man and went ahead, but in his mind Moiz knew that he had touched the creature…

To be continued…

HP said...

Voila!!!

Who is this new detective on the prowl??

Cheers,
HP

kurt said...

#ziom

Man this is really cool....
n btw i hope u r able to sit n also shit.... :)

#Maneka

Maam am really sorry
U c am doing my PhD, so am not aware abt the rules.
Please guide me thru it(the procedures).

#HP

I guess u had read Da Vinci 10 times n u couldn't guess who ziom is....
Sad man, its really sad

mattu said...

@People
Whtever happens to moiz after the sacred creature's mystical eyes had caste an evil spell on moiz
This is the conversation moiz had wid creature:(yes it spoke too)
Creature: Moiz...E.T.....
Moiz: Bolo Aakaa
Creature:Reverse thy name
Ziom: Jo hukum aaka.
That's it, then they lived happily everafter in ziomcity!
:) yes ziom and thee creature have 2 kids now.... one is izom-flies and reverses anyone's name it meets and the other zombie- it seems cranberries sung for it.

Snehal said...

@Mattu
Really pathetic. How could u reach such new heights.

@HP
U havent seent he video though. The uncensored version that is.


@Ziom

Sorry dude that noted environmentalist was for moi.It was a copy paste error that it (the environmentalist tag)came after ur name. Also try bribing the Censor Bored Thief sorry Chief and try airing the documentary with my expert comments. Nice to know that u recognized Elango from our earlier expedition. Why dont u give a thought to taking ppl for a paid expedition out there. Maybe we can find more creatures from the unknown out there. Then one more post. Maybe then we can dedicate an entire blog towards research.

@Kurt
I had told u that the noted environmentalist tag was for me.
Still the indefatigable tag was

kurt said...

#Ppl,

Just Cut the Crap n Stop pulling eachother's legs.
We should be celebrating for the achievement that we have made...

Bravo Guys!!!!
Kurt

Anonymous said...

Kurt,
You are doing a PHD and you don't know the rules.
muuaaaaah.

According to the laws, you have committed a crime. And we will take you to the court for this.

Angry,
Maneka Gandhi

Snehal said...

Sorry for not completing my comment making up for it now
@Kurt

I had told u that the noted environmentalist tag was for me.
Still the indefatigable tag kinda made up for it. The expedition reply for moiz even applies to you. Maybe u can be the guide and we can split the earnings. By the way nice term u got for the tribals(Maalik).

kurt said...

# Maneka
Thanks I would prefer the Food Court.

# Snehal
Actually it was a part of my curriculum, to learn the languages of the tribals.
And for the Noted tag it was rightly deserved by Mr. Moiz coz he was the one who discovered Moi-Sne-Menor.
For a change plz stop taking Credit for others work .....

Anonymous said...

@Kurt/Dirt,

Stop cracking such inane jokes. People stopped laughing on such jokes centuries ago. So, for once behave like a guy who is preparing for his Phd.

And, you will know what will you get as food when I send you to jail for this offence!

@Ziom/Snehal,
I hope you will testify against Kurt in the court and help us win the case against such environmental terriorists.

Angry,
Maneka

As If said...

There was this bunch of people all "fukat", trying hard to snatch the title of Mr/Ms fukat from each other.
They would dish out crap day and out in the garb of entertainment each day falling to the levels never touched before. Then one day this trio among them by the name of the GR8 kurt, CREATASAURAS Snehal and ZOMBIE ziom hatched a conspiracy to win and settle the race for the title for once and all.
One can see the result in form of this post, but the other fukats namely HARA BHARA or CTC hp, FRUSTU/MASTU mattu and FREAKY AS IF were not ready to bow down so easily, the result of which you can see more than a dozen comments including this one.

---Asif

Ziom said...

Finally commenting after reading lot of CTC types crap

#Kurt
I am able to sit and shit as well. It was Moiz who had touched the creature not me. And ne ways the criteria was that the creature should bite to make a person unable to shit, sorry…sit.

#Mattu
Getting ideas gurl. Wait for my next edition Kya hoga Nimmo, Nemo aur Mattu ka

#Snehal
No idea why do you want the title Noted Environmentalist, Super Environmentalist is always good right. Also if you are planning any expeditions try talking to kurt or moiz, why me.

#Maneka
!@#$%^&*.
#Kurt, got an idea for your Ph. D. assignment. Try and crossbreed Maneka and Salman you will get Salmaneka, then we will see what to do with her, sorry…him, sorry…confused.

finally Asif#
Big CTC from all the CTC adding guys/gurls whishing you that you wont be able to Cit or Chit after this.

Ziom said...

New Mysteries of the World continued...

After that jungle episode Moiz went to his lab and continued his research (Thankfully nothing happened to him, he was able to sit and shit as well). Kurt and Snehal also got busy with their respective assignments, one that Moiz had suggested them to cross between two highly dangerous species to form a super unstable species which can change its sex at will. Days passed by and one fine day their old friend Dr. Mattu (old because she was elder then the combined age of all three of them) dropped in to say hello. They narrated her the entire experience of their recent voyage to the jungles of Amazon. Dr. Mattu (who has done her Ph. D in Finding Nimmo) was really amazed by the entire stuff and also saw the documentary (I hope she didn’t heard it) created by Snehal SE Jawkar. Snehal (who had edited the documentary so that his name comes first in credentials) was so engrossed in showing the documentary to Dr. Mattu that he almost did’nt hear the footsteps behind him. He turned back and saw the the face of the person who’s shadow was cast upon him, she was………..MANEKA

To be continued…

HP said...

@Asif,
Really, it is pathetic to see ppl stoop so low to snatch the Fukat title from me. But, then there can be only one God in this field and that's the great HP . All of you bow to thee!!!

@Ziom,
old friend Dr. Mattu (old because she was elder then the combined age of all three of them)..
Are you still alive???????????

Anonymous said...

@Ziom/Moiz/or whatever...

How dare you use special characters while talking to me! Dont you know they are protected under the Special Character Protection Force.

You are condemned to more sittings/shittings/whatever under AC ..muaaaawhahhh.

Angry,
Maneka

Anonymous said...

@Ziom/Moiz/or whatever...

How dare you use special characters while talking to me! Dont you know they are protected under the Special Character Protection Force.

You are condemned to more sittings/shittings/whatever under AC ..muaaaawhahhh.

Angry,
Maneka

Anonymous said...

After taking up the issue "National Awakening" for the youth in my movie RDB, I did not get enuf popularity, since I am a perfectionist I want to delve into every other controversy around and work for every cause around to generate enough hype till the time my movies goes to the oscars.
Oh there was some topic under discussion, how dare you name some pretty creature with the short cut of your horrible names, I'll call a rally or what is it called a dharna at jantar mantar and gateway of India, I think the PM sits at one of these places, Oh I'll ask Prakash Mehra and decide where to do it.
You mortal lowly souls, every creature in this world is Gods creation and I think they should have the right to choose their own names.

BTW Maneka, please clarify which side u r on, I have to take the opposite to generate more publicity.

Call India TV to give live coverage and Aaj tak to broadcast a sensational report.

Live India, Vande Mataram and yes the creature should be given the right to choose its name.

Amir Khan

Snehal said...

@Ziom
Waiting for the next episode of Kya Hoga Nimmo,Nemo aur Mattu ka.
@Amir Khan
U forgot NDTV
@HP
Please take this discussion of FUKAt sumwhere else. In fact a new blog completely shud be dedicated to that per se.Waiting for ur blog on BI2

@Maneka Gandhir
Atleast get the spelling right (Dont know whether the R was added on purpose or by mistake.)And how dare u call my protege an environmentalist
@Amir Khan
Whoever u r supporting u will have to make sacrifices

Snehal said...

Please make a note of the error i have made and forgive me.

@Maneka Gandhir
Atleast get the spelling right (Dont know whether the R was added on purpose or by mistake.)And how dare u call my protege an environmental terrorist

kurt said...

# Ppl,
I don't know how to thank you all for such a huge response to my blog.
Now am sure that i will be able to compelete n publish my thesis without ne problem. Finally i'll get my PhD Degree.

#Ziom
I kinda feel that mattu is rite, that just by touching Moi-Sne-Menor you have been infected wid a new species of virus and that has transformed you, from moiz to ziom.(I wonder wht would hav happened if it had bitten u)

# Asif/Amir/.....
Yet another case of Split Personality (i wonder wht happened to u).
I'll explain you y the name Moi-Sne-Menor was given to the creature in my next comment(actually there's a small story associated with it).

# Maneka Madam
I dont know understand wht ur problem is? You urself dont practise wht you preach.
I heard that you use GoodNight in ur house.
How could you be so cruel?

# HP
Now you decide to whom the crown shld go.

Ziom said...

#Guys/Gurls
I think Kurt completed his assignment very well. One can see Maneka becoming Amir. I hope he can convert back, poor boy...oops, gurl... oops, again confused.

Anonymous said...

@Snehal/Behaal,
Dont dare you make fun of my name. That extra R was for good luck!

And yes, you all are environmental terriorists. And the language used by Snehal in the video is of such low standards that RR Patil has promised me to invoke POTA against him.

Angry,
Maneka

Anonymous said...

Hi!
I think this dicussion is getting out of hand.I mean, why dont we ask the creature's parents what they wann name it....the black buck i killed was "Pinku"....his father told me that.

Anonymous said...

@Sneh,
I am not new to sacrifices, donchya remmeber I sacrificed my first wife for the second one. I can sacrifice the second for the 3rd just waiting for her to say yes. As you can see sacrifice is in my blood.

@Kurt,
I support Sallu the parents of the creature shud have the right to name it.

And yes I have also consulted a bhoot baba on whose advise I have changed the spelling on my name to bring good luck.

Snehal said...

@Maneka Gandhi
Y did u remove the r now .No luck or wot?
And how dare u try to invoke Pota on me .I will ask RR Patil invoke PODA POTA(Kindly adjust for the spelling(After detailed discussion with my Protege Kurt (Sorry Mr Kurt Cobain)(It is actually in Mallu(Sorry for the inline comments (Kindly adjust))).)) on you.
Now ur changing from an evironmental activist to a member of the moral brigade .The morphing has begun(Dunno wot else u r gonna change into.)If u find the original documentary offensive then u can watch the PG rated version at 11 am on Discovery Kids . If not then u can watch the unedited version at 11 pm.

@Mattu
A late joke on the Zombie .please Rob it .(Rob Zombie)


@Amirr KKhan
I guess Salman or still better Salmaneka has the right to name his/her or both or neither children as he/she or both or neither can be both father and mother (Dunno thru wot context I or rather we hav reached here )

WE Guys and Gals just ROCK dont we???!!!!!

Anonymous said...

@Homos..Sapiens(yes HarryPotter included,ziom excluded)
okay so Dr Mattu has her PhD exams this saturday and the next so will b outta action.

@Ziom
Pls do sumthin useful in life.....
and CTC...last C stands for Creature, i mean move on ziom sumtimes relations wid creatures don work out, i know u had a family, 2 kids n all but still...relax mebbe get a homo...sapien along.... for a homo u can contact u know who ;) for sapien u can contact ne1 except the one u contact for homo!
Plz understand Dr.MAttu has lost all her teeth in doing the PhD frm Stanford!She needs to concentrate on her studies.

@Amir Khan
Good Job matey keep it up, proud of u.

@Maneka
I liked ur offspring's name, interesting species frm...crossbreeding-Quite a fusion of vegetarianism and carnivorous instincts,must have quite distinct and blistering features.
BTW wen u were anonymous u signed as maneka gandhi now u r maneka gandhi signed maneka...Mutliple personality disorder kya?
Cheers

Anonymous said...

Dr. Mattu,

That was some fake Maneka posting a comment under my name. And best of luck for your Phd. (Yeah, I am good).

I still would like to lodge cases against the trio and hope to give justice to the poor creature.

Angry,
Maneka

Anonymous said...

Did I hear anyone using the word 'HOMO' here. What is this!

Don't you know it is a crime. Please use cultured words.

I might just have lost a cause. But, that doesn't mean I have given up taking stupid cases.

R R Patil aka Aba

Snehal said...

@R R Patil
Y dont u add an extra R to ur name maybe .it might bring u more luck maybe the high court might rule in ur favour next time when u want to close down the dance bars.
Hurray!!!!!! High Court has currently raised the BAR in the favour of the dance bar owners. Toh guys sing along......
BAR BAR haan bolo yaar haan or maybe
BAR BAR dekho hazaar BAR dekho yeh dekhne ki cheez hai RR Patil ruba(had to make it rhyme somehow)

kurt said...

# ppl
I see that a lot of you have raised the question on the name "Moi-Sne-Menor". Why was it given to the creature?

To resolve all the queries am writing a new blog which will give you all an insight on the selection of the name.

Note: Blog will be made Public in 2 days time.

njoi
Kurt

As If said...

@Kurt, I assume that the new post would be on the
Fukat blog

HP said...

Yep Kurt,

I think you need to cross-post that at fukat blog too!!!

Cheers,
HP